Friday, July 30, 2010
Do You Always Know?
I am not someone who would talk about what goes in my head as I don’t think I can make myself understood because am not really the best at communicating what I feel. But yes I would be lying if I say that there is nothing that I want in life and that I have everything(infact to be honest there is nothing much that I have- no people around who I can depend on or would want to depend on, no aspirations, no plan and the constant tussle between wanting to be too many things at the same time)… There are times when I feel that if I want I can get rid of this mechanical life, tiresome job, irritating people around me and just give it all up, as I am under no compulsion to deal with it. But then I would not want to be one of those who always had it easy in life… though I have been quite lucky so far as I never had to really fight for things. (I have no idea if I am making any sense but believe me you, this is how my brain functions. It keeps oscillating between things trying to rationalize the randomness that exists and trying to fuzz out the little bit of clarity that I ever had about anything and everything)
Just like the fight club.. “After fighting, everything else in your life got the volume turned down”
and that’s why I just fight things every day…am always in this phase of learning where I feel that I can inculcate whichever thinking, rationalizing, randomizing processes that exist.
There are days when I want to be this person who works real hard, excels professionally and commands respect… then there are days when I don’t want to do a thing in life and just sit back and read a novel or watch a movie.. then there are days when I would be all hyper about doing something totally different from things that I have ever done…. Days where I dream of being involved in heroic deeds.. acts that set me apart from the rest.. days when I am this simple person who has a world of her own – a tiny one of just a few people who I live for… days when I am this nicey nicey being who is loved by all… days when I am the conniving bitch who does not give a damn about what is happening around and does not care for any one else as after all it is my life… days when I want to keep people around me happy and live for them and not for myself… days when I totally curse myself for having taken the decisions that I have and where I feel that life would have been a lot easier if only I had decided wisely earlier…. Days when nothing could have been better than what it is at the present… days when I am in perfect harmony with the kind of life I lead and am grateful for all that comes my way… days filled with envy where I want to be this particular person who has always enjoyed life more than I have.. days when I want to be this queen of sacrifices where people around me take pity on me….days when am this tragic heroine who has done a lot for others and does not get enough appreciation for what I do… days when I am this woman who has total control over her life and can do anything that she wants… days where am this mean person who has always hurt people around and am in this apologetic spree.. days when I feel that am better than most of the others as I am genuine and I donot pretend…oxymoronic yes but there are such days too… days when family is all that I would ever live for… days when I would easily give up on the personal life and just go wandering…. Days when I want to be a recluse in the Himalayas where life is peaceful… days when I want to be a monk as you submit yourself to this extremely exhaustive rule sheet that you never have to make any decisions further in life as there are no choices offered…
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Punjab - Of ghee laden food, colonial architecture, paddy fields - a devouts paradise and shopper's delight
Last weekend went on this trip to Punjab – the wheat capital of the country. Known for its fertile alluvial soil, hospitality, the golden Temple, rich food(read dripping with makkhan and overflowing with dry fruits), the 5 rivers- this is what sets this apart from its neighboring states.
Ludhuiana: The first stop
Around 400kms from the capital (New Delhi), Ludhiana is well connected by rail(trains at all convenient times, generally from the old delhi station, takes from 4-6 hours), road(buses from ISBT every hour, AC coaches, Volvos, seaters, sleepers..all kinds, 5-8hours), flights too. This is a huge industrial town and is the garment manufacturing hub. From machinery, to automotive components, to chemicals to fabrics to readymade clothes… the city breads business houses.
There are special fabrics like organic cotton which has attracted the attention of many a people. UV&W is a brand by the Venus group of industries that has been certified for its green technologies.
The culture is loud with kids in their teens driving cars bigger than twice their height. Large bungalows, independent houses with larger gardens sprinkled with lush green grass is a common sight. Evenings are about walks in the gardens with pets (especially dogs of the larger breed). People here live life king size and do not settle for smaller things.
When in town you must try the famous Kalia ka samosas , the butter kulcha at the famous lucky dhaba on the outskirts of the city (some 50kms on the GT Road), Lassi and the fresh makkhan.
The station is a small junction, not the neatest and full with people lying on the ground waiting for their trains or maybe just using the shelter.
The local transport constitutes the shared auto rickshaw and the cut little cycle rickshaws.
All in all a small city on the banks of the River Sutlej, where food is life!
Amritsar: Pit stop 2
The Golden Temple, the Jalianwalah Bagh, the wagah Border, the Tandoori Kulchcha stuffed with the aromatic Indian spices, jalebis and lassi.. yeah that’s the city in short!
The golden Temple is the most revered place by the Sikhs. It witnesses a minimum of 50,000 tourists everyday. The langar(community meals) served to some 30000 people, long queues to get a glimpse of the guru granth sahib(the holy book) and pay homage to it. The Prasad overflowing with ghee is a delightful sight.
The community kitchen is something that left me amazed. The mechanized way of making rotis with tones of flour, the huge (this would be an understatement) cooking vessels and the hundreds of devotees involved in dicing vegetables, cleaning dishes, serving, cooking has a lot to teach about harmony and peace.
The interiors of the main sanctum are covered in exquisite carvings on the roof, the domb and the pillars. The intricate design is beautiful and unique. The hand written guru Granth Sahib – is kept on the first floor under an intricately embroidered cloth.
The jalianwalah bagh where the horrifying massacre took place is a historic site. It still has bullet marks on the walls enclosing the bagh when General Dyer ordered a brutal attack on the innocent congregators and the well which people jumped into to save themselves from the pouring bullets.
All the modernization in the park has robbed it of its historical significance in a way but nevertheless it does not fail to attract the tourist as they flock in huge numbers.
Right next to the Golden temple..a 5mins walk away is the famous Kulcha shop which is a dingy place but if you can overlook the hygiene for a mere 10 mins … it serves the bestest that you would have had, better than anything that you would ever dream of. Right ahead is the jalebi shop at the road junction which again is not really the cleanest of the kitchens but is definitely the tastiest of the jalebis
Across the Regeant cinema theatre is the lassi shop which caters to a minimum of 2000 customers on a daily basis.
The other katras which attract crowd include the Papad-Warian Bazaar - Katra Kathian, Mishri Bazaar, and Katra Mohan Singh. The aroma of the Papad-Warian Bazaar is appetising. Stacks of the home-made papad and wadian lie in the streets ready for customers to grab them.
The city is in the throes of modernization with Coffee shops like CCD’s , Barista, high end hotels and diners cropping up like mushrooms to provide a good experience to the tourists who flock to offer an ardaas at the holy shrine.
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